I mentioned the idea of assumptions briefly in a previous post regarding how others often assume that Autistics are overreacting in various situations that we're actually experiencing as distressing or even traumatic. I'd also like for parents, teachers, and other professionals to be taught that we aren't overreacting in those situations. Rather, we are reacting … Continue reading Reactions and Assumptions
Autism Issues
You’re In My Spot
Being upset when someone sits in "our" chair or takes "our" spot is an Autistic reaction that has moved from stereotype to joke. It's a bad joke because it's making fun of something that's often involuntary and extremely distressing to many of us. I realize that it can appear that we're overreacting to those who only see … Continue reading You’re In My Spot
Burned Bridges
For most of my life, my experiences were confusing and inexplicable. I could not explain, even to myself, most of what happened to me, others' reactions, or my own reactions to what was happening. In a post earlier this year I wrote: In the past I’ve run away from these events. I’d never return to … Continue reading Burned Bridges
Uniqueness and Late-Diagnosis
I've heard it said by allistics (non-Autistics) that people who are late-diagnosed Autistic just "want to be unique" or "think we're special." This is sometimes even theorized as the reason we go in to be evaluated as adults. Let's ignore the fact that many of us struggled, floundered, and failed for many years before gaining … Continue reading Uniqueness and Late-Diagnosis
Reflections on My First Autistic April
My apologies for not writing much recently. I've been recovering from April, as I'm sure many of my readers have been too. I underestimated how difficult my first Autistic April would be and have been resting this week. Of course I was Autistic all the other Aprils of my life, but this past month was the … Continue reading Reflections on My First Autistic April
Feelings, Emotions, and Uncertainty
At any given time, I cannot tell how I'm feeling emotionally. Sometimes physical sensations can be understood and named in the moment, but actual emotions are slippery and defy categorization. Even once I've managed to grab hold and examine the emotion sometime in the future, it remains largely a mystery to me. "How are you?" … Continue reading Feelings, Emotions, and Uncertainty
Time, Processing, and Transitions
Unexpected events are largely unavoidable. Things happen, stuff comes up, plans change. I understand that. I also live with small unpredictable people, which adds another dimension to unexpectedness. I also recently learned of some insecurities on the part of my allistic (non-Autistic) husband that feed into many of the unexpected event-related difficulties in our marriage. More … Continue reading Time, Processing, and Transitions
The Joy of Autistic Body Language
While sitting at my child's class, I sometimes can see into a different room. I often will pause in my writing or reading and watch what's happening from all the way across the building. I'm there because of my child. They decided this was their "must do" activity and we did everything in our power … Continue reading The Joy of Autistic Body Language
Gentle Parenting isn’t Just for Neurotypical Children
This post is one that's been on my mind for a while now and it got long. I tweeted a short thread about this issue the other day, but I'd like to elaborate about it here also, especially since it's April and articles about "dealing with" Autistic children are being shared with renewed ferver/intensity. Gentle … Continue reading Gentle Parenting isn’t Just for Neurotypical Children
Seeking Understanding
As I've already explored, communication and relationship difficulties between Autistics and allistics (non-Autistics) are not solely the fault of Autistics. Both sides have to seek understanding. To start with the obvious, understanding of Autistics cannot come from reading allistic perspectives of Autistic lives. Allistics haven't lived it. They are only guessing about what it's like to … Continue reading Seeking Understanding