At any given time, I cannot tell how I'm feeling emotionally. Sometimes physical sensations can be understood and named in the moment, but actual emotions are slippery and defy categorization. Even once I've managed to grab hold and examine the emotion sometime in the future, it remains largely a mystery to me. "How are you?" … Continue reading Feelings, Emotions, and Uncertainty
reasons
Time, Processing, and Transitions
Unexpected events are largely unavoidable. Things happen, stuff comes up, plans change. I understand that. I also live with small unpredictable people, which adds another dimension to unexpectedness. I also recently learned of some insecurities on the part of my allistic (non-Autistic) husband that feed into many of the unexpected event-related difficulties in our marriage. More … Continue reading Time, Processing, and Transitions
Seeking Understanding
As I've already explored, communication and relationship difficulties between Autistics and allistics (non-Autistics) are not solely the fault of Autistics. Both sides have to seek understanding. To start with the obvious, understanding of Autistics cannot come from reading allistic perspectives of Autistic lives. Allistics haven't lived it. They are only guessing about what it's like to … Continue reading Seeking Understanding
Internet Ads and Accessibility
In the Twitter #autchat discussion about social media accessibility this week, a topic came up that has been bothering me quite a bit lately. The issue is one of internet ads and the websites that now detect AdBlock and require that the program be turned off (i.e. the website be whitelisted) before anyone can access their … Continue reading Internet Ads and Accessibility
Messing Up Such a Simple Thing
Sometimes I'll be going along, doing fairly well, and then I'll mess up again. In a big way. Patterns in my life often emerge from new situations and experiences because they aren't really new. These are things that have been happening my entire life, but that I never had the ability to describe or explain … Continue reading Messing Up Such a Simple Thing
Autistic Disclosure – Parenting Edition
It is my strong belief that Autistic children need to be involved in and have a say* regarding when, how, and who gets told that they're Autistic. For more information about my parenting philosophy, which has heavily influenced my perspective on this issue, please see this post. Now, I understand that there are some situations … Continue reading Autistic Disclosure – Parenting Edition
Autistic Parenting
I've found that being Autistic has greatly influenced my parenting style and I'd like to delve a bit more into that topic. Many Autistic adults are parents. In fact, most of the Autistic adults I know, especially in person, are mothers. Interestingly enough, those whom I know have tended to gravitate towards gentle parenting styles and … Continue reading Autistic Parenting
Not an Excuse
Contrary to many allistics' (non-autistics') perceptions, Autistics disclosing our Autism to them is not a "get out of jail free card" or an "excuse for bad behavior." Yes, often we disclose our Autistic status in order to try and make our lives a bit easier, but under the circumstances, that's not necessarily a bad thing and … Continue reading Not an Excuse
Being Believed
Now that I'm an adult, people sometimes believe me about my sensory issues. I wish they'd believed me as a child. I wish that I hadn't gone through decades of not-knowing that everyone else didn't feel and experience the world the way I did. It still shocks me when I'm believed by other people. I … Continue reading Being Believed
Navigating a Minefield vs Strolling Through the Woods
It occurred to me, after writing my previous post about autistic friends, that I might have made all autistic friendships seem overly simple and easy to navigate. In reality, of course, there are still potential missteps when being friends with and conversing with other autistics - even good long-term autistic friends. We're human and certainly … Continue reading Navigating a Minefield vs Strolling Through the Woods
Mamautistic 