To my Dear Neurosiblings (and to myself, as well), It is courageous to respect your needs. It requires immense strength to be able to admit that you need more support. Making accommodations for yourself or requesting them from others is a difficult task, at best. It can feel insurmountable at worst. It can feel like … Continue reading A Letter of Encouragement and Support
understanding
Communication Discouragement
I've felt a bit discouraged today. My rough two weeks are finished, but they were followed by another week, which had some difficult surprises of its own. That week began with a pretty startling (to me) miscommunication. I had tried my very best to craft a clear, concise, informational letter only to receive in return … Continue reading Communication Discouragement
Time, Mutism, and Levels of Communication
In late April I figured out something else about some of the communication issues in my marriage, which led to a realization that there seem to be different levels of communication for me. Some are easier than others and I can occasionally experience mutism regarding the more difficult types while still managing to use the … Continue reading Time, Mutism, and Levels of Communication
Reactions and Assumptions
I mentioned the idea of assumptions briefly in a previous post regarding how others often assume that Autistics are overreacting in various situations that we're actually experiencing as distressing or even traumatic. I'd also like for parents, teachers, and other professionals to be taught that we aren't overreacting in those situations. Rather, we are reacting … Continue reading Reactions and Assumptions
You’re In My Spot
Being upset when someone sits in "our" chair or takes "our" spot is an Autistic reaction that has moved from stereotype to joke. It's a bad joke because it's making fun of something that's often involuntary and extremely distressing to many of us. I realize that it can appear that we're overreacting to those who only see … Continue reading You’re In My Spot
Burned Bridges
For most of my life, my experiences were confusing and inexplicable. I could not explain, even to myself, most of what happened to me, others' reactions, or my own reactions to what was happening. In a post earlier this year I wrote: In the past I’ve run away from these events. I’d never return to … Continue reading Burned Bridges
Uniqueness and Late-Diagnosis
I've heard it said by allistics (non-Autistics) that people who are late-diagnosed Autistic just "want to be unique" or "think we're special." This is sometimes even theorized as the reason we go in to be evaluated as adults. Let's ignore the fact that many of us struggled, floundered, and failed for many years before gaining … Continue reading Uniqueness and Late-Diagnosis
Reflections on My First Autistic April
My apologies for not writing much recently. I've been recovering from April, as I'm sure many of my readers have been too. I underestimated how difficult my first Autistic April would be and have been resting this week. Of course I was Autistic all the other Aprils of my life, but this past month was the … Continue reading Reflections on My First Autistic April
Feelings, Emotions, and Uncertainty
At any given time, I cannot tell how I'm feeling emotionally. Sometimes physical sensations can be understood and named in the moment, but actual emotions are slippery and defy categorization. Even once I've managed to grab hold and examine the emotion sometime in the future, it remains largely a mystery to me. "How are you?" … Continue reading Feelings, Emotions, and Uncertainty
Time, Processing, and Transitions
Unexpected events are largely unavoidable. Things happen, stuff comes up, plans change. I understand that. I also live with small unpredictable people, which adds another dimension to unexpectedness. I also recently learned of some insecurities on the part of my allistic (non-Autistic) husband that feed into many of the unexpected event-related difficulties in our marriage. More … Continue reading Time, Processing, and Transitions